Cheat Code! 2-Minute Rule to Connecting

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Do you ever go into a work or even a personal conversation focusing on what you need to get out of it? Especially when you’re busy? You might be saying to yourself: “I have 30 minutes with this person and I need to make sure that I walk away with A, B and/or C.” Sometimes I find myself jumping right in instead of asking the other person how they are doing and genuinely showing an interest in them. You know what I’ve realized over time? Taking two minutes at the beginning of a conversation to actually see and listen to the other person will make the remaining 28 minutes so much more productive.

You can include this small dose of empathy in every human interaction – whether you are negotiating, disagreeing, networking, or giving feedback. When negotiating, take the time to understand what motivates the other person, what their values are and what’s important to them. If you’re able to understand what the other side wants, you’re much more likely to come to a win-win outcome. Also, when you use empathy to build strong relationships, people are more likely to agree to favorable terms during a negotiation and say yes to your requests.

Likewise, when you have to disagree with a colleague, use your natural empathy to try and see the issue from their perspective before voicing your opinion. This will allow you to come to a shared understanding. And when you tap into your empathy to give constructive feedback, you avoid triggering a threat response in the other person. Ultimately, this increases that person’s ability to take in what you say, protects your relationship with them, and helps improve an employee’s performance without shattering their confidence. 

Using empathy in every relationship will help you build loyalty and trust in every relationship.  It’s a winning strategy that will give you an honest and authentic edge.

To hear audio versions of my pep talks on topics like this one (and to get access to hundreds of short guided meditations on Meditation Studio), click here!

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Sorry, Not Sorry: How to Speak Assertively