Delivering a Kind No in 4 Easy Steps
There are often things you genuinely want to do, whether it’s a new project or a fun event, but simply cannot make the time to take on. There are also requests that you want to decline, but you’re worried that the opportunity won’t come around again. As hard as it can feel to disappoint someone, you won’t if you deliver a “kind no.” To say no with kindness:
Start with thank you instead of I’m sorry. You don’t need to apologize for turning down a request. Say, “Thank you for the opportunity, or for thinking of me,” and then that your plate is full right now, or that you’re unfortunately too busy to take it on.
Don’t over-explain your no. Keep it short and sweet. If this is a close relationship, you can elaborate briefly on what you’re currently prioritizing (a specific project or building your business, etc…).
You can also try this: “Not Right Now.” Say you’re asked to join a political committee in your town; you want to do this, it’s important to you, but you know in your heart you just don’t have the time to devote to it. Say, “I would love to, but I can’t right now. Can we talk about a way that we could work together in the future?” By doing this, you’re leaving the door open.
If you’re feeling generous, offer a smaller assist like suggesting someone else who would be up for the task or sharing a link to research that might be helpful. Finding this sweet spot between yes and no keeps you focused on your priorities, while still coming across as a team player.
To learn more about leading with kindness and strength, check out my course on LinkedIn Learning.